I suddenly feel im nt ready for adm.I dunno.. i need sometime to work on my artpieces and to perfect it.Im a semi perfectionists.You know what, is like going for a war without being armoured with the most sophisticated and indispensable weapons.Thus its easily defeated.I feel very vulnerable now !.. im trying to be positive...and positive ..but sometimes i cant control myself too.Facing the music is so painful.Sometimes you cant believe it,sometimes you wish you didnt live in this world at all,Sometimes you wish u were somewhere else relaxing ,having no worries about this and that.

I feel so stressful abt working too,Im afraid of my ideas not being accepted ,I really freaking out soon about Life..i suddenly lose abit of faith here and there.A little.i dunno...But is the reality that is so hard,, i really dunno whats gonna happen to me.i wonder if im making the correct decision, and if it is i must jolly well make sure i go for it throughly.Is like my life is only between the IT and design world.I have only semi talents in them.Thats what makes it difficult to pull through and breathe through.